Signs (2002)

Signs: “I can’t hear my children…”

Would you murder a perfectly good dog to rescue your sibling? More importantly, would you continue to patronize your vet’s practice if they were responsible for the death of your spouse? These and so many other questions arise from a viewing of M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs

One thing is certain. When aliens OR cats start rattling on closed doors, you gotta get two beers and jump. The references on this podcast are nothing if not topical; your beloved podcasters blame the quarantine day drinking. The irony is not lost on Darth or Jason that they decided to release their Signs episode the very same week that the U.S. government confirmed the existence of UFOs.  So hide yo’ kids, hide yo’ dogs, and bust out the water, because the aliens GON’ FIND YOU! Just don’t forget to cook one last, labor-intensive meal for your children before you all die.

Adam Brown may not know how to make fancy food, but he sure does know how to make food fancy.

Mr. Brown presents to you…“Reggae Man”

Humanoid breakfasts are just the initial evidence of these podcasters’ waning mental health during week seven…hundred and forty five of quarantine. Signs certainly makes for relatable material amidst the current circumstances of isolation, UFOs, and total uncertainty.

Don’t panic yet, #Hindsighters. Your persevering podcasters have yet to bust out the tin foil hats, and it has NOTHING to do with the fact that grocery stores are completely out of tin foil.

In these trying times, we are all doing our very best not to go full Mel Gibson. You NEVER go full Mel Gibson. However, Darth would like to make it abundantly clear that her tombstone epitaph will not be changing. #DiedBetweenMelsThighs

No matter your psychological state, there’s nothing like an extraterrestrial attempting to murder your asthmatic child with wrist poison to help you suddenly remember that most beings, no matter how strange and startling, are susceptible to blunt force trauma.

During this age of unending quarantine and countless tornadoes, Darth, Jason, and Mr. Brown won’t let you down. Your adored podcasters will continue to entertain you one episode at a time, so stay tuned, stay safe, and stay sane. 

Darth Jader
Darth Jader is a Pirate Queen. She is the co-hostess of the “Hindsight is Horrifying” podcast. She is also “funny, insightful, and sarcastic,” according to her boyfriend, who is currently under duress. You can take the Oxford Comma from her when you pry it from her cold, dead, and lifeless hands. She also speaks Spanish, unlike Ron Burgundy.